Plus Size and Worthy

Have you ever felt like you didn't measure up to the world's standard of beauty? Or that your opinion on health wasn't valued because you were plus size and clearly anyone who's plus size doesn't care about their health insert eye roll? I imagine that you have, as most women in today's world are average or should I use that dreaded word "plus size." This is where my story begins.

Last week I was engaged in conversation with a group of people and the topic turned to exercise. I felt comfortable enough to mention that I love going to the gym and working out at home. But my comfort was short lived when the people I opened up to gave me a weird response that went like this.

"Really, you go to the gym???”

...Yes, that was all they said! Not, "Oh really, tell me what you like to do?"As if they couldn't believe that a size 10/12 woman could possibly enjoy exercise. I noticed everything. I noticed the surprised look, the questioning look and the curious look. The curious look I can take because at least I know they want to learn more. But the surprised and questioning look needs to be addressed now.

Ladies...and gentleman, when you see an "average" woman walk into the gym you need to realize that she is just as capable and strong as the ones that appear healthy. She walks into the gym with a different set of struggles that she tries to hide. Maybe it's the way her exercise clothes feel or maybe its the dimples on her legs. But make no mistake...she is powerful. She pushes all her insecurities aside to work on herself. She may even eat less than you do as the world has always told her, "A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."  She may have a hormonal imbalance. She may be just testing exercise out for the first time. But for whatever reason she is there, CELEBRATE HER! She is one very capable woman.

For the last 16 months, I have diligently exercised nightly in my home. Although the pounds haven't come off, the measurements have decreased. Yes, I still fit into my size 10/12 pants but the tone in my legs and arms are improving. I also started going to the gym to do a TRX class. Woah, that is intense! And although I have to modify 75% of the moves, I am still.doing.it.

The internal differences I have noticed are a decrease in unwanted anxiety and sadness. There is one particular exercise instructor I love,Shaun T. He motivates people to throw away whatever negativity they have in their life. While I'm pushing through tough moves or memories or conversations wink wink, I am literally throwing away all that negativity that creeps up. And if you've ever been a plus size woman, those feelings of unworthiness have slipped in from time to time.

Here's the WOW thing? I have taken pictures of myself throughout the process. And when I think nothing is changing, the pictures prove my mind is lying to me. I'd like to share a few with you but encourage you to look beyond the surface. Look at my content smile as I wrap my arms around my family. Look at the muscle developing from being able to do three full "man" pushups. Look at the confidence it took to stand in front of a mirror.

Blow past the roll and dimples and instead look at my heart. My heart wants to tell others that beauty comes from following The Creator and NOT from the size of your pants. The Lord cares far more about your spirit than your clothes size (1 Peter 3:4). So the next time you see a plus size beauty heading to the gym be sure to ask her about her workout. She is just as worthy as everyone else.

You should clothe yourself instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.

1 Peter 3:4

I hated taking this picture five years ago and hated looking at it even more.

The picture on the right was taken in 2017. The difference is strength to move past negativity.

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Do Christians Have Perfect Lives?

You know, even Christians have struggles sometimes. Our lives aren’t perfect. In this season of life, struggle seems to follow me and I am reminded of what Jesus said in the book of John. 

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.””

John 16:33 NLT

He said we would have trials! I’m glad Jesus was honest about this. But knowing that doesn’t make it easier. On one such struggling day, a hymn came to mind. It goes like this...

“My Hope is built on nothing less, than Jesus blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus name.”

Friends, our lives aren’t meant to be easy. And the people in our lives weren’t put there to bring us joy and fulfillment. Did you know that song was written in 1834-183 years ago! Edward Mote most likely wrote that song as he was going to work and later used those lyrics to comfort a friend’s very ill wife. I find it completely fascinating that God put those lyrics on his mind so long ago and in the midst of struggle today, God placed those lyrics on my mind. Friends, God knows what He’s doing. Nothing happens by accident. 

When I heard that song, I was reminded that our joy is not found in things, people, vacations, family, etc. True joy comes from our Father. Look back at that verse in John. “Take heart! He has overcome the world.” When you are struggling, look for scripture, listen to songs, pray for peace. You may have struggles but you also have hope. And having that hope is a gift from your Father above.