As I dug through the bag of clothes I was going to give to Goodwill, I saw you park beside me with your two young girls. I jokingly explained that Once Upon a Child would only take a handful of
my kids' clothes and I didn't know what to do with the rest. We started a conversation that I thought was going well! I thought to myself, "Maybe she would like to get our girls together." We went through the usual introductions that most moms do: name, number of kids, where we lived and then I asked,"Do you stay home?"
"No, I'm a teacher." I saw the small eye roll when you said,"teacher."
"Oh that's great!" I exclaim. We had something in common, I thought. "I used to be a School Counselor" before I stayed home," I said.
"Oh yah, well I wish I could stay home." I saw the eye roll again.
"Awww" I said empathetically but was caught off guard so I didn't know what to say after.
Your daughter popped her head out from the car and I quickly changed topics to our kids. The conversation came to an end and I watched you get back in your car, get on the phone and pull out of the parking lot without even a wave.
I've thought about this all afternoon. What could I have said to you? How could I have bridged the gap for working moms and stay-at-home moms? What you didn't know is that as much as you wish you could stay at home, this job is a lonely one. Instead of seeing you roll your eyes at me, I wish you could have said that my profession was great too. I wish there wasn't any jealousy and that we could have formed a friendship on the common ground of just being moms. I wanted you to know that I think you are simply amazing. It's hard to work full time and then give your best to your kids at night. I wish I could have told you that my sister is a working mom and I highly respect her. I wish you would have asked me how I managed to do my job too. But you didn't. And just like other people have done, you brushed over me as if I were invisible. The envy made you blind to my heart's desire to have a friend.
I don't hate you though. I don't even dislike you. I realize that God made women with strong compassionate hearts. We all have our own struggles that God hears. I love my job even if some don't recognize it as a real job. I guess my greatest wish would be that women would stop comparing themselves to one another, that we supported each other regardless of our profession. I wish that jealousy would stop from both sides and kindness would bridge the gap between the two. Whether you work outside or inside the home, appreciation for both professions could change our world.
I closed the van door, got in my car and drove away. No new friendships were made. The car ride home was so quiet. It made me think long and hard. That's when I decided to write this blog.
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