Today was a beautiful day. I woke up feeling rested and excited to attend a weekly Bible Study on the book of Isaiah. The kids were well behaved and did everything asked of them. “Put your shoes on, walk to the car, make sure to buckle up. I don’t want to be late,” I recited as I do every morning.. But this morning, unlike most mornings, they listened obediently. It had to be one of God’s little blessing for me that day. I dropped the middle child off at preschool and the youngest and I drove to church. She was unusually quiet, looking at the pictures in a Thomas and Friends book. So I turned on my audiobook and enjoyed the sound of being read to.
At church, I grabbed a cup of Earl Grey tea with the tiniest splash of half and half. Pouring the milk reminded me of the first time I had drank tea like this. A kind friend had shown me how to make it with milk and it seemed to comfort my spirit. Swishing my drink around now, I walked to my table and began conversing over breakfast with the ladies. We discussed the usual, “How’d your morning go,” conversation and then it was time for the speaker to begin.
Now sitting in the soft padded chair of a large auditorium, I took notice of everyone around me (as I often do) and fired up my Bible app. The speaker was doing an awesome job of explaining Isaiah 61.
“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.”
Isaiah 61:1 NLT
She explained that Isaiah was actually talking about Jesus. He is the anointed one. “Hmm,” I thought. “I would have never thought he was referencing Jesus.” But her message of truth was powerful.
About middle way through, I needed to use the restroom. That wonderful cup of tea was pleasant for a time but now I struggled with the idea of having to leave in front of everyone. I hate leaving while someone is speaking, don't you! And everyone has to do that awkward shuffling of the legs thing so I could actually get out. I tried waiting. But it was impossible. So sighing in my head, I got up and left.
When I returned, I chose to sit on the end of the aisle as not be rude and ask everyone to move again. I opened up my Bible app and by habit noticed everyone once more. There was the beautiful lady with perfectly placed blonde hair. I also noticed the eye glasses of another and thought to myself how they fit her face so well. It’s not that I wasn't paying attention because I was, its just that I focus better if I'm not actually looking at the speaker. It’s like doodling for those that need help focusing. Then something peculiar happened. My eyes scanned the opposite side of the auditorum and there in between a gap of ladies, I saw her! Could it be her? Same hair, same glasses, same mannerisms as she listened to the speaker. Was it my mom?”
“No, it’s just someone that looks like her,” I chided myself. And my peaceful spirit began to sink because this woman reminded me that I hadn't seen my own mother in a long time. I recalled an earlier time in our lives when we had just moved to Richmond. Another similar lady had been shopping in Wal-Mart. I was so overcome with excitement that my mom was there, I walked right up to her and touched her on the shoulder! "Excuse me.” But when she turned around, my excitement turned to disappointment as it wasn’t her at all. I had explained how she looked just like my mother and how we had moved and that I missed her so.
I thought about how it would be awesome to do LIFE with Mom and attend Bible Studies with her. How nice it would be to have lunch together afterwards. Tears began brimming in my eyes and I had to look away. “I must not cry,” I thought to myself. I tried not looking at this lady. But I was captivated by her. “If only I could run over and double check. If only.” And that’s when I recalled the speaker’s verse.
“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.” Isaiah 61:1 NLT
“Jesus! Thank you for comforting my broken heart.”
That verse was brought to my attention because the Lord knew I would need to hear it. He knew that I would change seats and see this beautiful lady. He knew my spirit was calm in the morning but would be broken hearted by mid day. He brought that verse to my attention at EXACTLY the right moment.
Friends, I write this blog to inspire but also to contemplate my own life with you. My idea has always been to show authentic feelings, deep thoughts from the heart that let others know they are not alone. Many people have mothers close by. Please cherish them. Some people weren't blessed with good mothers and are left wondering if anyone might love them at all. Find those women and love on them. Sadly some have mothers that have passed on. What a complete sorrow that must feel like. Listen to them when old memories surface of their own mothers.
I am blessed to have a mother I can call my best friend. Although we live states apart, we chat weekly and she often says,”Oh Kim, if we lived closer we could go to Bible Studies together. We could walk together.” And with pangs of sadness, I wish that could happen too. We cherish the friendship we have and yes, absence does make the heart grow fonder. But just like good friends are often separated by moves, God needs His people spread out all over the world. Our job is to be the light of Jesus in a dark place. And so I will continue to do this journey with great joy for the Lord. I ask that you find those women who are far away from family, maybe in the midst of child raising and become a mentor mom to them. Women supporting women. Wisdom being showered upon each other as a heavenly blessing from above. Could you imagine how our world would change if we chose to look at each other as part of the family instead of strangers sitting across from each other in a large auditorium.
Love and Miss You Mom! Let's talk soon :)